Skip to main content

Author: Scarlett De Bease

Trust Your Own Opinion

Trust your own opinion

One of the pieces of advice I share with my clients, and in many of my presentations, is not to let others tell you what you should wear or buy.

I’m talking about friends, family, or the salesperson that tells you EVERYTHING looks faaaabulous on you.

Yes, I show my clients which clothes fit and flatter them the most, but I NEVER tell them what they must wear or buy.

This becomes their decision when they see how great they look in the right clothes for them, and I ALWAYS and I mean always tell my clients that the only opinion that counts when they look into the mirror is their own. Period!

Don’t let anyone tell you not to wear something that makes you happy or be talked into buying something you don’t really like.

Your first impression is the one that counts.

One of my wonderful clients needed to learn how to stop letting her mother-in-law’s negative comments get into her head, making her feel insecure while she was successfully transforming her wardrobe, life, and self-image.

People from different generations than yours, like moms and daughters, have VERY different style tastes and they are likely not right for you. You have to be able to say no to their ‘helpful’ comments and trust your own opinion.

Simply put…you need to listen to your own opinions, not others.

Know Your Personal Style

know your personal style
Exhibit A

Personal style is one of the most powerful ways we can express ourselves, but it’s not always easy to find our unique voice in a world that’s constantly telling us what to wear.

Take a look above at Exhibit A from a segment on a morning TV show. 😬😳😬😳😬😳😬😳😬😳😬😳😬😳😬😳😬😳😬😳

A stylist who has a large following on Instagram was invited to inspire the viewers with the outfits he created.

I actually like the blue pants with the funky striped top on this particular woman, but does it inspire you? Help you know what to wear?

Pssst, follow me on Instagram to get styling tips that will inspire and help you.

The bottom line is we’re bombarded with images of what’s trendy or what’s expected, but true personal style is about embracing who you are, knowing how to flatter all your unique features, and wearing what makes you feel good and comfortable.

The next time you see someone on TV tell you what you should be wearing, don’t believe them. They don’t know you or even what you look like.

Remember, your personal style is not just about the clothes you wear, it’s about how you feel in them.

I saw the following on a label for a dress I recently bought for myself:

❤️Fashion says me too. Style says only me. ❤️

Dress in clothes that are perfect for just you, and you’ll be loving

having your own personal style.

You need to set up some boundaries for yourself to not be influenced to buy clothes you end up not loving to wear.

And, speaking of boundaries….

know your personal style

Announcing a FREE event but with limited virtual setting.

Boost Your Boundaries & Elevate Your Style

In this one-hour interactive LIVE webinar, Image Consultant, Scarlett De Bease, and Boundaries and Communications Expert, Sandy Weiner, will teach you how to improve your boundaries and your personal style to increase confidence and success in every part of your life. 

Includes Q & A and free gifts! Registration limited. 

Register now before it fills up.

Trying-On Clothes Tip

To shoe or not to shoe when trying on clothes?

Here’s a quick trying-on clothes tip to help you properly evaluate whatever you’re trying on…

Wear shoes!!!!

It is amazing how much better pants, jackets, dresses, skirts, or even tops, look when you’re wearing the shoes that you’d wear with them.

Shoes add height which completely changes the proportions of how clothes sit on your body.

Even a ½ inch heel makes a difference.

Just the other day I tried on a new dress barefoot and was feeling like it was just ok.

Then I put on the sandals I would wear with it and was in love.

You might be not buying or wearing certain clothes because you didn’t try them on with shoes.

The twenty seconds it will take you to put on shoes will allow you to be less unhappy when you are shopping or putting an outfit on when home.

Hey, it’s a shoo-in!!

👠👠👠👠👠👠👠👠👠👠👠👠👠👠👠👠👠👠👠👠👠👠👠

And then she said…

“Please take advantage of Scarlett’s expertise to save you time AND money. She will teach you tricks of the trade to make you look and feel your best. She provides so much information on a personal level, you will know how to dress to make you look like your best self.” JB

Here’s what JB did to say the above.

Creating Confidence Through Personal Styling

Creating Confidence

Read and hear the styling tips and personal image thoughts I shared as a guest on The Driven Woman Podcast.

The title of my spot is Creating Confidence Through Personal Styling.

Whether you are going to a school reunion, taking your kids, or grandkids,  to school, presenting, networking, or getting back in the dating world, YOU need to feel and look confident.

Why? Because, you never know who you’ll bump into….but really the most important reason you need clothes that make you look your absolute best, is
because you bump into yourself every day and feeling insecure or frumpy is self-destructive.

Listen to this episode and get inspired to start creating confidence with your clothes.

Just a bit of what you’ll learn:

  • Having a closet full of clothes and “nothing to wear”
  • How I was raised to embrace being different
  • Creating a wardrobe for the body and lifestyle you have now
  • Dressing for success, reimagined

And then she said

Before working with Scarlett, I had a closet full of clothes that no longer fit and zero ideas about how to dress my “new” middle-aged body in anything other than leggings. Scarlett provided thoughtful suggestions based on my needs and feedback about why pieces worked or didn’t work with my body type. More than once, she was part stylist, and part therapist, encouraging me to try new colors and styles. I now have outfits at the ready and get dressed without hating myself! Scarlett is a gem and I recommend her to anyone struggling to find their fashion way. Heather Frechette-Crowley

How to not look frumpy

Today I want to talk about how wearing clothes that are too tight and in the wrong colors can make you look bigger. frumpy, and miserable.

That’s exactly how Jamie Lee Curtis was styled in her Oscar winning performance in Everything Everywhere All At Once.

She was intentionally styled to look frumpy, unhappy, and shapeless in the movie simply by wearing clothes that did not fit or properly suit her.

Take a look below, at how Jamie Lee Curtis looks in her outfit from Everywhere All At Once.

The top color is awful on her as is the fit, size, and style of her clothes. Slumping also contributes to the tummy sticking out more than usual, as does wearing pants below the waistline.
Even her eyeglasses are not flattering.
All these ‘mistakes’ were deliberately made.

Note: Check out this post about turtlenecks and why they are not flattering for many.

How to not look frumpy

Now, look at how her very same body looks in clothes that properly fit and flatter her.

How to not look frumpy

Wow, right?

In real life wearing clothes that are in the wrong style, shape, or color for you can have the same negative effect that makes women of all ages, shapes, and sizes look bigger and frumpier than they are.

It also destroys self-confidence and ruins first impressions. Especially the most important first impression…yours… when you look in the mirror to check out what you’ve put on.

Here’s how to not look frumpy…

Wearing clothes that are too tight can create unflattering bulges and emphasize areas that you may not want to draw attention to. It will also make you look older and unhealthy. 😬

Instead, choose clothes that fit well, flatter your body type, and unique features, without being too snug.

Also wearing the wrong colors can make your skin look dull and washed out, which will make you look older, sicker, and more tired than you actually are. We are all a bit tired, so why bring more attention to it?

The bottom line is wearing clothes that are too tight, or too big, and in the wrong colors will make any woman look bigger and frumpier than she actually is, regardless of her body shape.

By choosing clothes that fit well and flatter your skin tone, you can create a polished and put-together look that accentuates your best features and makes you look and feel confident and beautiful.

As always, if you need any help finding the perfect fit and colors for your body type, don’t hesitate to reach out to me and get you started on finally learning how to dress the body and life you have now!

You deserve to always look and feel put-together and ready for anything on your calendar, no matter your age shape, or size.

Tired of never knowing what to wear?

Do you ever:

1. Tug at your clothes to get them in place as the fit is not right?

2. Worried about how much more you can eat that day before a button, seam or zipper might pop?

3. Feeling self-conscious about your appearance?

4. Worry that your clothes are out of style or dated-looking making you feel frumpy?

5. Concerned that your clothes make you look older than you are or feel?

If you answered yes to even just one of these very common situations, you need a seat at my upcoming virtual What To Wear workshop.

It’s happening on March 31, 2023, at 12 noon ET.
You’ll get a recording even if you can’t attend live,
but only if you reserve your seat HERE.

Tired of never knowing what to wear?

It’s time for you to love the clothes you wear.

What To Wear Workshop

Learn what to wear.

Learn what to wear

Do you know why this dress is wrong for many women and right for others? Want to know if it’s right or wrong for you?

Learn what to wear plus get many more styling & shopping tips, when you grab your virtual seat at my What To Wear Workshop on March 31, 2023.

No worries if you can’t attend, because a recording will be sent following the workshop. Check out all the details here.

The Perfect Pant Style For You

Bet you’ve been wondering…

Should I wear wide-legged pants?

Skinny-legged?

Flare?

Cargo?

Pleated?

Joggers?

What style is in?

The answer is…I have great news for you because the pant style that is perfect for you is…

The one YOU look great in!

It’s now that simple because all of the above pant styles are ‘in.’

The days of only one style being in style are OVER!! And, thank goodness.

When you wear ‘what’s in’ but it doesn’t look good on you… you’ll feel uncomfortable, self-conscious, and annoyed because you’ve wasted money once again.

Which style makes YOU look longer, leaner, and more comfortable?

This takes experimenting if you don’t already know which styles and proportions are perfect for you,

When you do know the perfect pant style for you, it will keep you from wearing a style that can make your tummy and hips look bigger, or your legs appear shorter.

However, you might be many years in asking yourself:

  • What the heck does looks good on me?
  • Why do I never love the clothes I buy?
  • Why can’t I find clothes that fit me?
  • Why do other women always seem dressed better than me?

Yes, you can wear whatever pant style you want, but you might still be wondering…what is the perfect pant style for me.

You are exactly why I created the Powerful Presence VIP  Intensive.

The Perfect Pant Style For You

If it’s been years of you never loving what you wear, even with the help of a blog or magazines. That’s why YOU are the perfect person I made the VIP day for.

And the reason you want it is because, in the scope of ONE DAY, we define & discover your personal style, including the perfect pant style for you, and end your getting-dressed stress!

You will dress confidently & be ready to tackle anything on your schedule. Every day!

This VIP Day is for you if you’re ab-so-lute-ly ready to:

  • Confidently walk out of your closet every day looking stylish & pulled-together
  • Stop wasting money on clothes that don’t work for you
  • Feel excited (Yes! It’s possible!) when getting dressed every day
  • Know how to quickly pull together an outfit – and feel sure it’ll look great on you

Not sure you want a VIP Day but do you want wardrobe styling help?  Get on a call with me here.

How To Avoid A Wardrobe Malfunction

How To Avoid A Wardrobe Malfunction

The best stories come from either my clients or the women who want to work with me.

I’ll share one with you a few sentences from here, but first…

We’ve all had the experience of something in our outfit either busting open or barely
fitting properly, and one way to avoid wearing an outfit that will make you very uncomfortable is to sit it out.

Yup, I mean sit down.

I encourage you to sit down when you put an outfit on or try on a new piece of clothing.

If…

  • You feel constricted, hear a strain, or a pop, don’t wear it, and definitely don’t buy it.
  • It is uncomfortable, don’t wear it, and definitely don’t buy it.
  • You tell yourself you’ll lose weight first, don’t wear it, and definitely don’t buy it. 
  • You can’t sit down without feeling miserable or potentially embarrassed,
    don’t wear it, and definitely don’t buy it.

So, here’s the story from a woman I spoke to this week, who wants my help getting her
closet filled with outfits that will fit, and flatter her.

All she simply wants and will get, are clothes that she can’t wait to wear. Sound familiar?

She wants to replace the mistakes hanging in her closet and showed me one of
her expensive examples.

It was a very pretty 3-piece pant set that a salesperson talked her into buying
for her daughter’s wedding a couple of years ago.

The jacket and pants were nice, but the sleeveless tank was much shorter than what I would have picked out for her. It simply wasn’t long enough to fully cover her stomach.

The tailor she took the outfit too, offered a solution. He would add snaps to connect the tank to her pants. 🤔

That looked great when she was standing, but at the wedding and reception, she was seated.

So what do you think happened when she sat?

Yes, you guessed it…SNAP, SNAP, SNAP!

But, if she had done the sit test, or, even better, had known me back a few years, she would never

have been so self-conscious and uncomfortable on such an important day in her and her daughter’s life.

Take a seat when trying on outfits, and you will know how to avoid a wardrobe malfunction that will ruin your day or night.

I’ve never heard of attaching snaps from a top to a pair of pants, and for good reason. It’s a VERY bad idea.

PS. If you find yourself standing in your PJs each morning, staring into your closet hoping that today’s the day you’ll find an outfit that fits you perfectly…stay tuned for a new and quick way to have a closet full of clothes that makes you confidently happy and stylish!

Want to know more? Add your name to the waitlist HERE, and get an Early Bird price only available to the first 3 who sign up.

How To Avoid A Wardrobe Malfunction